Ned Beauman - The Teleportation Accident - Hodder & Stoughton

Time remaining

  • -- days
  • -- hours
  • -- minutes
  • -- seconds
Other Formats
  • Paperback £9.99
    More information
    • ISBN:9780340998441
    • Publication date:11 Apr 2013
  • Downloadable audio file £P.O.R.
    More information
    • ISBN:9781444767551
    • Publication date:11 Sep 2012

The Teleportation Accident

By Ned Beauman

  • E-Book
  • £P.O.R.

From the award-winning Ned Beauman, an 'unquestionably brilliant' (TLS) novel that establishes him as one of the exciting and influential voices in modern British fiction.

HISTORY HAPPENED WHILE YOU WERE HUNGOVER.
When you haven't had sex in a long time, it feels like the worst thing that could ever happen to anyone.

If you're living in Germany in the 1930s, it probably isn't.

But that's no consolation to Egon Loeser, whose carnal misfortunes will push him from the experimental theatres of Berlin to the absinthe bars of Paris to the physics laboratories of Los Angeles, trying all the while to solve two mysteries: whether it was really a deal with Satan that claimed the life of his hero, the great Renaissance stage designer Adriano Lavicini; and why a handsome, clever, charming, modest guy like him can't, just once in a while, get himself laid.

From the author of the acclaimed Boxer, Beetle comes a historical novel that doesn't know what year it is; a noir novel that turns all the lights on; a romance novel that arrives drunk to dinner; a science fiction novel that can't remember what 'isotope' means; a stunningly inventive, exceptionally funny, dangerously unsteady and (largely) coherent novel about sex, violence, space, time, and how the best way to deal with history is to ignore it.

LET'S HOPE THE PARTY WAS WORTH IT

Biographical Notes

Ned Beauman was born in 1985 and lives in London. He has written for Dazed & Confused, AnOther and the Guardian. His debut novel, BOXER, BEETLE was shortlisted for the Guardian First Book Award and the Desmond Elliot Prize, and won the Writers' Guild Award for Best Fiction Book. Ned Beauman was picked by The Culture Show as one of the 12 Best New British Writers in 2011. His second novel, THE TELEPORTATION ACCIDENT was longlisted for the Man Booker Prize 2012.

  • Other details

  • ISBN: 9781848945029
  • Publication date: 19 Jul 2012
  • Page count:
  • Imprint: Sceptre
Less than two years after his multi-award-winning debut 'Boxer, Beetle' Ned Beauman returns with another fizzing firework of a caper, featuring as many cracking escapades as its predecessor . . . His prose is wonderfully discursive and buzzes with originality, while scenes of pure farce nod respectfully to Thomas Pynchon and Hunter S Thompson . . . his bold characterisations, slapstick humour, slick similes and tangential subplots are sublime. A strong, smart follow-up that proves Beauman is more than comfortable with the hype he's created for himself. — Time Out
Terrific . . . if there was ever any worry that he might have crammed all his ideas into his first book, this makes it clear he kept a secret bunker of his best ones aside. — Guardian
'If you care about contemporary writing, you must read this . . . BOXER, BEETLE was acclaimed as the most inventive fictional debut in years, buzzing with energy and ideas, and Beauman's second novel keeps up the pace' — Tatler
Funny and startlingly inventive . . . Beauman is a writer of prodigious talent, and there are enough ideas and allusions and comic set pieces in this work, longlisted for the 2012 Man Booker Prize, to fill myriad lesser novels. — FT
A glorious, over-the-top production, crackling with inventive wit and seething with pitchy humour . . . A beguiling success . . . Ingenious . . . There is such an easy felicity in Beauman's writing and such a clever, engaging wit . . . that one feels he could write something as much fun every two years. The prospect of which makes me very, very happy indeed. — Scotsman
An extraordinary, Pynchonesque flea-circus of a book...Ned Beauman's pyrotechnical comic novel, his second, is as violently clever as you'd expect from his earlier book, BOXER, BEETLE... [a] frantically entertaining pasteboard extravaganza — The Sunday Times
This is an unquestionably brilliant novel, ribald and wise in equal measure . . . a witty and sometimes deeply moving fictional exegesis of the Modernist twilight. — TLS
I'm sure it's the funniest novel on the list. — Evening Standard
He's done it again . . . Beauman does adolescent male lust and anomie with the verve of a young Amis and this is a great romp of a novel, delightful in its inventiveness. — Prospect
A hoot - very clever and charming, with an awesone range of reference. — Sunday Telegraph
Funny, scandalous, decadent and erudite, THE TELEPORTATION ACCIDENT is a hugely enjoyable madness with flavours of Pynchon, Huysmans and Jerome K. Jerome. — Nick Harkaway
Beauman, whose first novel BOXER, BEETLE was widely acclaimed, sets out his stall as a latter-day Evelyn Waugh in this dazzling satire that begins in 1930s Berlin. Biting black comedy. — The Times
[Beauman] is blisteringly funny, witty and erudite . . . Beauman manages to combine the intrigue of a thriller with the imagery of a comedy. It makes for an excellent read. — Daily Telegraph
Ned Beauman is a very funny writer, but also a very serious one. His second novel is a glorious rigmarole of satire, insanity, genre tropes and aching romantic pain, but never doubt that it is an essentially serious book. — Independent
Its meticulously crafted plot skitters from sci-fi to noir thriller; with comedic interludes and some romance for added sizzle . . . you'll be left bedazzled. — Daily Mail
Beauman has a huge gift for satire and the wry phrase...brought together so immaculately you never notice how hard he's working. — Word Magazine
A novel that turns everything on its head, Beauman's book is critical, funny and deliciously deviant. — The List
Ned Beauman is a writer of unceasing invention and his second novel is replete with ideas. — Metro
Popping with ideas, fizzing with vitality and great fun to quaff. — Independent on Sunday
Ned Beauman has written another very pleasing comic romp through the 1930s, offering a second offbeat perspective on the rise of the Third Reich. It is, once more, full of good jokes, erudite winks and historical whimsy . . . Beauman excels at both the grand, jostling structure and the individual sentence. His similes are often inspired, his dialogue is frequently hilarious, and his ability to keep all the plates spinning, as the story dashes between years and continents, is very impressive. — Literary Review
Lovable, brilliant and entertaining . . . Beauman takes a huge range of styles and genres and pushes them and bends them often to glorious effect . . . Beauman has a huge talent for metaphor and simile and hits with almost all of them. My personal favourite was 'there was enough ice in her voice for a serviceable daiquiri' - very Raymond Chandler. Also brilliant are some of his characters - notably Colonel Gorge who suffers from 'ontological agnosia' brought on by sniffing too much of the car polish that has made him rich, which means that he cannot differentiate between pictures and reality. That this references back to the Brechtian approach to theatre is just one example of the cleverness of Beauman's approach. But mostly, Gorge is just hilarious . . . Beauman is one of the most innovative young writers around and is one to follow. — www.thebookbag.co.uk
It is brilliantly witty, with a pace edging on breathless. Every stage is like the denouement of a great crime novel refigured as science. The reader is constantly challenged (and rewarded) as occurrences alternate between being clear and nebulous. Genuinely exhilarating. — We Love This Book
At times THE TELEPORTATION ACCIDENT is as bloody-mindedly difficult as Egon Loeser, but it builds slowly, brings its threads together with great skill, and Ned Beauman turns a good phrase as his characters dance their line between the cleverly obnoxious and the obnoxiously clever. — SFX
Praise for Boxer, Beetle — :
a piece of staggeringly energetic intellectual slapstick . . . it's crammed with strange, funny and interesting things — Sam Leith, Guardian
an enjoyable confection; witty, ludicrous and entertaining — James Urquhart, Financial Times
An astonishing debut...buzzing with energy, fizzing with ideas, intoxicating in its language, Boxer, Beetle is sexy, intelligent and deliriously funny — Jake Arnott
A rambunctious, deftly-plotted delight of a debut — Observer
Ned Beauman's astonishingly assured debut starts as it means to go on: confident, droll, and not in the best of taste . . . Many first novels are judged promising. Boxer, Beetle arrives fully formed: original, exhilarating and hugely enjoyable. — Peter Parker, Sunday Times
Frighteningly assured — Katie Guest, Independent on Sunday
Exuberant . . . There are politics, black comedy, experimentation and wild originality - and I haven't even got to the beetles. Terrific. — The Times
Debut bout is a real knockout . . . dazzling — Daily Express
Its ambitions are enormous, in terms of the range, energy and quality of the writing — Literary Review
Dazzling . . . As in PG Wodehouse and the early Martin Amis the tone is mischievous and impudent without being merely jaunty or wacky . . . in Erksine and Broom we have two endlessly curious heroes whose thoughts are fascinating even at their silliest. — Leo Robson, Express
A witty, erudite debut . . . thick with trivia, it confidently takes on British fascism, the Thule society, anti-Semitism, atonal composition, sex, and the class system . . . An articulate and original romp . . . often gobsmackingly smutty. Beauman is one to watch. — Katie Allen, Time Out
Not one for the easily shocked, young scribe Ned Beauman subjects the reader to a parade of ghoulish events and ghastly theories throughout his dazzling first novel Boxer, Beetle . . . deeply researched and punchily written, this is an utterly unique work that marks the London-based author out as an exciting new voice in fiction. — The List
Beauman skips with panache between his dreadful version of the present and the macabre absurdities of a period when cock-eyed science and rabid anti-Semitism provided a toxic cocktail for the upper classes. His killer irony evokes early Evelyn Waugh, and his lateral take on reality Will Self at his unsettling best. This is humour that goes beyond black, careening off into regions of darkness to deliver the funniest new book I've read in a year or two. — Pete Carty, Independent
Clever, inventive, intelligently structured, genre-spanning, as magpie-like in its references as any graphic novel, and above all, an enjoyable, high-octane read through a fascinating period in history. — Rob Sharp, Independent on Sunday
The 1930s are wonderfully evoked, and the historical sections of the novel are taut, thematically rich and extremely well written . . . it takes real skill to make a tragic hero out of the five-foot, nine-toed alcoholic Seth Roach . . . it's clear from this compelling debut that Beauman can perform the complicated paradoxical trick required of the best 21st-century realist novelists: to take an old and predictable structure and allow it to produce new and unpredictable connections. — Scarlett Thomas, Guardian
An edifying treatise on the absurdity of eugenics and racial theories, and probably the most politically incorrect novel of the decade - as well as the funniest . . . Monstrous misfits with ugly motives are beautifully rendered in a novel where Beauman's scrupulous research is deftly threaded through serious themes in a laugh-out-loud-on-the-train history lesson. — Anna Swan, Sunday Telegraph
I can only gape in admiration at a new writing force and wonder what he's going to produce next. — Victoria Moore, Daily Mail
The scenes set in the past are reminiscent of Evelyn Waugh's Decline and Fall in their grotesque stupidity and amorality, and the present-day characters are as ruthless as any in modern noir fiction. It also makes a persuasive argument for the moral repercussions of Darwinism and the absurdities of fascism and repressed homosexuality, but that's just three aspects of a witty, fascinating and romping read. — James Medd, Word
Beauman writes with wit and verve. — Carl Wilkinson, Financial Times
A shape-shifting, time-travelling, genre-teasing treat. — Seven
Coronet

Doctor You

Jeremy Howick
Authors:
Jeremy Howick
John Murray

Devil's Day

Andrew Michael Hurley
Authors:
Andrew Michael Hurley

The second novel from the author of the award-winning bestseller The LoneyEvery autumn, John Pentecost returns to the Lancashire farm where he grew up to help gather the sheep from the moors. Generally, very little changes in the Briardale Valley, but this year things are different. His grandfather - known to everyone as the Gaffer - has died and John's new wife, Katherine, is accompanying him for the first time.Every year, the Gaffer would redraw the boundary lines of the village, with pen and paper but also through the remembrance of folk tales, family stories and timeless communal rituals which keep the sheep safe from the Devil. This year, though, the determination of some members of the community to defend those boundary lines has strengthened, and John and Katherine must decide where their loyalties lie, and whether they are prepared to make the sacrifices necessary to join the tribe...Gripping, unsettling and beautifully written, Andrew Michael Hurley's new novel asks how much we owe to tradition, and how far we will go to belong.

Hodder & Stoughton

The Reluctant Contact

Stephen Burke
Authors:
Stephen Burke

The Svalbard archipelago, 1977, Norwegian territory, yet closer to the north pole. Russian engineer Yuri arrives on the last boat to the Soviet mining outpost of Pyramiden, as the Arctic sun disappears for the winter. Yuri still plays by Stalin-era rules: Don't trust anyone; Keep your head down; Look after number one. Yet when a co-worker is found dead deep in the mine, the circumstances appear strange. Against his better judgement, Yuri breaks his own rules, and decides to investigate. At the same time, he begins a stormy love affair with the volatile, brooding Anya. She has come to Pyramiden to meet someone who has not shown himself in three months, if he exists at all. While the whole island is frozen in twenty-four-hour darkness, Yuri enters a dangerous world of secrets and conflicting agendas, where even the people closest to you are not always what they seem.

Sceptre

Madness is Better than Defeat

Ned Beauman
Authors:
Ned Beauman
Hodder & Stoughton

Blood Daughter

Dreda Say Mitchell
Authors:
Dreda Say Mitchell
Hodder & Stoughton

Lucky Ghost

Matthew Blakstad
Authors:
Matthew Blakstad
Hodder & Stoughton

The New World

Scott K. Andrews
Authors:
Scott K. Andrews

Kaz, Dora and Jana - three people from three different time periods, brought together by forces they don't understand, given powers they can barely comprehend.Their powers have brought them together.And nothing - not war, not betrayal, and not even death - has been able to tear them apart.And now, after everything they've been through, they're about to find the bonds of their friendship tested in ways they could never have imagined.This is the stunning, epic conclusion to the incredible story begun in TimeBomb and continued in Second Lives: a story of friendship, of love, and of learning what it means to be extraordinary.

Hodder Paperbacks

End of Watch

Stephen King
Authors:
Stephen King
Hodder & Stoughton

The Wild Air

Rebecca Mascull
Authors:
Rebecca Mascull
Two Roads

A Dying Breed

Peter Hanington
Authors:
Peter Hanington

'HANINGTON EXCELS... AN IMPRESSIVE DEBUT' The Sunday Times'THOUGHTFUL, ATMOSPHERIC AND GRIPPINGLY PLOTTED' Guardian'HANINGTON HAS TRUE TALENT' The Times'TREMENDOUS' William Boyd'ENTHRALLING' Michael Palin'AMAZINGLY GRIPPING' Melvyn Bragg'A BELTING GOOD READ' A.L. Kennedy'I LOVED EVERY MINUTE IN THIS BOOK'S COMPANY' Fi Glover'A NATURAL STORYTELLER' John Humphrys'DEEPLY INTELLIGENT' Will GompertzKabul, Afghanistan.In a brilliantly plotted contemporary thriller with echoes of Graham Greene and John le Carré, William Carver, a veteran but unpredictable BBC hack, is thrown into the unknown when a bomb goes off killing a local official. Warned off the story from every direction, Carver won't give in until he finds the truth.Patrick, a young producer, is sent out on his first foreign assignment to control the wayward Carver, but as the story unravels it looks like the real story lies between the shadowy corridors of the BBC, the perilous streets of Kabul and the dark chambers of Whitehall.Set in a shadowy world of dubious morality and political treachery, A Dying Breed is a gripping novel about journalism in a time of war, about the struggle to tell the stories that need to be told - even if it is much easier not to.

Hodder & Stoughton

Jericho's War

Gerald Seymour
Authors:
Gerald Seymour
Sceptre

Harmless Like You

Rowan Hisayo Buchanan
Authors:
Rowan Hisayo Buchanan

SHORTLISTED FOR THE 2017 DESMOND ELLIOTT PRIZESHORTLISTED FOR THE 2017 BETTY TRASK PRIZESHORTLISTED FOR THE 2017 AUTHOR'S CLUB FIRST NOVEL AWARD SHORTLISTED FOR THE 2016 BAMB READERS AWARD FOR BREAKTHROUGH AUTHORLONGLISTED FOR THE 2016 JHALAK PRIZE'This brilliant debut novel by Rowan Hisayo Buchanan is cause for celebration.' LORRIE MOOREWritten in startlingly beautiful prose, HARMLESS LIKE YOU is set across New York, Berlin and Connecticut, following the stories of Yuki Oyama, a Japanese girl fighting to make it as an artist, and Yuki's son Jay who, as an adult in the present day, is forced to confront his mother who abandoned him when he was only two years old.HARMLESS LIKE YOU is an unforgettable novel about the complexities of identity, art, adolescent friendships and familial bonds, offering a unique exploration of love, loneliness and reconciliation.

Sceptre

My Grandmother Sends Her Regards and Apologises

Fredrik Backman
Authors:
Fredrik Backman

Hodder & Stoughton

After the Fire

Belva Plain
Authors:
Belva Plain

Hyacinthe has always been the quiet one: gentle, artistic, never glamorous. Swept off her feet by an ambitious young doctor, she is happy to put her own ambitions as a designer to one side, to become the mother of two lovely children.Until the day she must face the fact that Gerald is seeing other women. Distraught, desperate, she goes to his office to seek proof. And because of what happens there on a terrible night, she loses the custody of her children . . .The enthralling story of a woman whose life is first torn apart by injustice, then rebuilt in unexpected ways.

Sceptre

Glow

Ned Beauman
Authors:
Ned Beauman

'ADDICTIVELY GOOD' The Times'Over-whelming' Independent'Supercharged' Evening Standard'Deliciously, startlingly, exuberantly fresh' GuardianWith GLOW, Ned Beauman has reinvented the international conspiracy thriller for a new generation.A hostage exchange outside a police station in Pakistan.A botched defection in an airport hotel in New Jersey.A test of loyalty at an abandoned resort in the Burmese jungle.A boy and a girl locking eyes at a rave in a South London laundrette . . .For the first time, Britain's most exciting young novelist turns his attention to the present day, as a conspiracy with global repercussions converges on one small flat above a dentist's office in Camberwell.

Hodder Paperbacks

The Ties That Bind

Erin Kelly
Authors:
Erin Kelly
Hodder Paperbacks

The Disappearances

Gemma Malley
Authors:
Gemma Malley

Riveting, brilliantly imagined and passionate, THE DISAPPEARANCES, the compelling sequel to THE KILLABLES, will appeal to everyone who loved the powerful and gripping storytelling of THE HUNGER GAMES. They walked in silence onto the raised path that led to the East Gate. The closer they got, the louder the buzzing was. As they approached the gate it was almost unbearable. There was a stench in the air that made it hard to breathe, a stench that made the hair on the back of Lucas' neck stand up on end. Whatever had brought the flies here wasn't good.It's been a year since Evie and Raffy escaped the controlling regime of the City, leaving Lucas behind to rebuild the ruins of the place they once called home. And Lucas knew that once he said goodbye, Evie would be lost to him forever...But the City soon finds itself plagued by another terrifying threat: the Disappearances: teenagers who have gone missing from within the City walls, apparently vanishing into thin air. With the City at stake, Lucas has no choice but to call on his old friends - even if seeing them together is more than he can bear.

Hodder Paperbacks

The Burning Air

Erin Kelly
Authors:
Erin Kelly
Hodder Paperbacks

A Welcome Grave

Michael Koryta
Authors:
Michael Koryta

Lincoln Perry was once a rising star on the Cleveland police force, until he was kicked out after he got in a fight with Alex Jefferson, the millionaire his fiancée left him for. When Jefferson is tortured and murdered, it isn't long before the police are at Lincoln's door asking questions.Things go from bad to worse when Lincoln agrees to do a favour for Jefferson's widow - track down the dead man's son who has unknowingly inherited his millions. What should be a routine search for a missing person ends with the son's body lying in the morgue and Lincoln in jail.Lincoln realises that Jefferson's millions are the target of a thirst for revenge that hasn't been satisfied by blood. But soon Lincoln is being pursued by a pair of deadly assailants and under pressure from the police, who are determined to put him back behind bars, if he survives long enough to make it there . . .

Sceptre

Boxer, Beetle

Ned Beauman
Authors:
Ned Beauman

NED BEAUMAN HAS BEEN NAMED AS ONE OF GRANTA MAGAZINE'S BEST OF YOUNG BRITISH NOVELISTS 2013Longlisted for the 2012 Man Booker Prize and shortlisted for the for the Guardian First Book Award, Ned Beauman was chosen by The Culture Show as one of the twelve Best New British Writers in 2011.This is a novel for people with breeding. Only people with the right genes and the wrong impulses will find its marriage of bold ideas and deplorable characters irresistible. It is a novel that engages the mind while satisfying those that crave the thrill of a chase. There are riots and sex. There is love and murder. There is Darwinism and Fascism, nightclubs, invented languages and the dangerous bravado of youth. And there are lots of beetles. It is clever. It is distinctive. It is entertaining. We hope you are too.